Worst Date Ever #1

Most of this blog(which no one reads by the way) has been a series of complaints. Just like online reviews, most of the time they will be bad because the human mind likes to hear the "dirt". The bad things that happen to people. I've decided to write a series of my worst dates I've ever been on, starting with the worst to date naturally.

So there I was...........No kidding. I decided to take a young lady I had met recently on a casual 1st date. Get to know her and see if sparks fly. She was a very attractive blonde with what seemed like a good head on her shoulders, little did i know what the night would bring. The signs were clear of what she had the potential to be like. She was in the Military(strange for an attractive girl). Her voicemail was borderline annoying, and she prefered to text(no bueno). But not to judge a book by it's cover, I proceded with the plan of a dinner and go carts.

I picked her up and the first words out of her mouth were

"So when I was leaving my house, I tripped a little bit and peed myself"

I was speechless with the response and didn't really react. She continued;

"you see, I have this bladder problem where I have a hard time holding it in"

Are you kidding me, our date hadn't even begun and already I'm a little creeped out. However, my optimism prevailed. Maybe she was just very honest, I can respect that.

As we sat down to dinner, she did get up quite frequently to use the restroom, I started talking to her and getting to know her at dinner. Find out what her story was and how she ended up in the military. She proceded to tell me her story without sparing the details. After high school, she decided to spend the next year looking for a husband. No school, work, just husband hunting. She didn't achieve her goal and with no direction in life, joined the military. I know I know, another warning sign of a proposterious evening, but the night had already begun and there was no backing out. I could not rescind on the evening because I had already announced the plans.

After dinner she asked me another honest question.

"Can we stop at the supermarket, I need to get another maxi-pad because of my previous accident."

O.k. A little too much info, but no biggie, I've got sister's. After what seemed like an hour, she emerged from the Ralph's shopping center. She steps back in the vehicle and begins to describe her shopping experience.

"Sorry it took so long, you know if you change a babies diaper and you haven't changed them in a while, it kinda smells? Well I had a hard time finding the scented maxi-pads. I needed the scented ones, and I couldn't find them."

That was too much, optimism settled deep in the pit of my stomach and a "creeped out" feeling filled my soul.

I still can't believe this actually was real. Most people I have shared this with don't believe it. I guess it's all uphill from there.